My Favorite Wall Is Alive Again

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

This time last year I was losing my mind: stressed about moving out and finding a place for all my stuff to stay the summer, preoccupied by a boy, "studying" for finals, and nursing an aching heart that did not want to leave Lawrence for even three months.
This time, I get to stay.
I get to stay in Lawrence and experience a sticky, humid, green midwest summer. I get to help residents and future Jayhawks. I get to surround myself in a creative environment and talk about clothes. I get to write content for a blog and try my hand at social media for real. I get to drive eight hours to Chicago to visit Molldoll, and I get to meet my family in Pittsburgh for as classic a vacation as there is.
This time, I know a little bit more about who I am. About what will work and what won't. About when to push myself (which is pretty much always). 
Reaching the halfway point would be a lot more frightening if I wasn't spending all my time here in Lawrence the best way I can.
Things will be very different in the fall. I think it's sort of crazy how much change you are forced to go through in these four years. Even if you lived at home and kept your life mostly the same, your classes would still change every semester. Most of us move each year and live somewhere new with new people. We hold internships for a few months and jobs for hopefully more. 
It's pretty strange how unlike the rest of your life this educational period is.
For four years you try to cram in as much experience as possible for something you know nothing about and that will surely only be learned through more experience. You are taking everything you've learned with you, but still. Once you graduate college you're expected to grow up and settle down and be stationary and stable when all you've been taught to do is be on the go.

For now I'm just going to focus on making it a successful summer and not eating a third cookie as soon as I post this.

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